10 Lessons I Learned in 2021 (2024)

2021 went by so quickly. It seems like just yesterday I was thinking about my plans for the remaining months of the year, and now I find myself writing this blog on New Years Day. As I sit here and reflect on 2021, I am filled with so much gratitude and growth.

I am so grateful for all of the opportunities I had. I got to travel to some pretty epic locations; some of my most memorable were summiting Mount Whitney in a day, freediving with sharks in Hawaii, learning to backcountry splitboard and ski, and embarking on various road trips around the Western US. I got some pretty exciting opportunities in my career, got a story published in a book, and started creating art again. I spent more time with family and friends, and even got involved in a new relationship, and unfortunately also a break-up. It’s safe to say that overall, it was a pretty great year. Definitely better than 2020!

But that doesn’t mean the year went without uncertainties, anxieties, self-doubts, setbacks and obstacles. I started therapy, and learned to replace hopelessness with hope, fear with love and setbacks with opportunities. I learned techniques to calm my mind, focus on my goals and create habits for gratitude and self care.

It all comes down to mindset. The last few years has been proof that we can overcome anything with the right mindset. A mindset of positivity, compassion, resilience, humor and humility. We can use these uncertainties as opportunities for growth, learning, adapting, evolving and finding our purpose and passions in life. We can use these moments to motivate us to not only better ourselves, but to make the world a better place by inspiring others to find happiness and purpose. A ripple effect of positive energy!

We can (and will) get through it. Together.

Here’s a few lessons I learned this year, and will take with me into 2022.

Life is full of unexpected moments, and if it’s anything we have learned from 2020 and 2021, it’s exactly this.

So far, we’ve survived and adapted to a global pandemic and the emergence of new variants. We’ve also seen worldwide lockdowns, mandates, protests, riots, societal division, political division, economic inflation, millions of workers resigning from their jobs, and the great toilet paper shortage. And don’t forget those pesky murder hornets!

On top of all that, we have our personal day-to-day things to worry about: jobs, relationships, rent, finances, taxes, health and anxieties about future uncertainties. There has been a steady rise in mental health issues the past few years, and it’s easy to see why.

It’s time for a collective pause.

We can’t control what happens to us. We can’t change the past or predict the future. We can, however, control how we react to current situations and obstacles. We can either sit and wallow in the “doom and gloom,” or we can take action by learning from what went wrong, and using that knowledge to positively move forward.

The past few years are proof that we can get through difficult situations. Utilizing an optimistic and creative mindset, we can adapt, evolve and pivot to overcome obstacles and thrive in the face of chaos and adversity. There will be days where it feels like the world is ending and that nothing good can ever come our way. Don’t let those thoughts drag you down. Prove yourself wrong and show yourself how strong and empowered you really are. When we are empowered, we can help empower each other. And that’s where the change happens.

Always remember: the bad moments will pass.

Can you imagine a world where everyone was “perfect?” Where everyone had the “perfect” appearance, mannerisms, mindset, career and lifestyle? How boring would that be? Count me out!

And what is “perfect” anyways? What are “flaws”? Who decides these social standards?

None of us are perfect, and that’s a good thing. It’s what makes us unique. It’s what makes us human. It’s what makes us real. What makes people interesting are their differences. We can learn so much about each other, and ultimately ourselves, by interacting with people who are different than us. People who have different backgrounds, upbringings, careers, political views, religious affiliations, dreams, experiences and stories.

We need to condition ourselves to be more accepting. And that starts within. Personally, I’ve dealt with self-esteem and confidence issues for years, and I can’t even begin to tell you what a toll those can take on one’s mental, emotional and even physical well-being. I was constantly disappointed that I didn’t meet my standards of perfection. I constantly felt like I fell short, that I wasn’t enough. And those thoughts manifested into negative energy that reflected outwards. I attracted people who were on the same low frequency, which made me even more miserable. When I began to look within, and make changes, I noticed I was more accepting of myself and compassionate towards others. I began to break the cycle, and break free of negative self-talk and habits. And the biggest one was letting go of the idea of perfection.

We all have bad days, even if it doesn’t appear so on our social media highlight reels. We all have days where we feel like complete shit. We all have days where we feel like we are failing, falling short, and just plain “not enough.” But when we focus on positivity and progression over perfection, we learn to control those thoughts and our reactions to overcome them.

I say life is too short. It’s time we celebrate our weirdness and our “flaws.” Easier said than done, but when we put in the work, it does get better. Spending time and energy trying to be perfect is exhausting. Stop it. You are enough just as you are. Just aim to be the best version of yourself, enjoy life and be kind.

Enjoy those rest days, you’ve earned them! Contrary to what hustle culture tells us, there is no rule that we have to be constantly busy with work to be a productive or valuable member of society. In fact, the more we work ourselves towards stress, exhaustion and burnout, the less productive we become. Our bodies and minds start to get fatigued, and our performance and productivity significantly deteriorate. Rest days allow us to recharge and get time to do what we love, and come back to work with a positive attitude and energy to get the tasks done. Prioritizing a good work-life balance allows us to live a life of balanced productivity, purpose and leisure.

You’ve probably heard of the Great Resignation in the headlines recently. Many people are quitting their jobs because they are tired of toxic working conditions, long hours, short breaks and even being asked to take their work home with them. It’s very clear they don’t feel valued, and may even feel dehumanized due to expectations. It’s become the “new normal” to check emails around the clock and prioritize work over one’s personal life. This can lead to problems arising beyond the workplace, taking a toll on mental and physical health, as well as relationships.

Are you feeling stressed or signs of burnout? Relax. Take a deep breath. Get rid of the “should’s” in your head. I remember a quote I read on social media that said “stop ‘shoulding’ all over yourself,” and I try to apply that to my everyday life. There are so many things that we “should be,” “could be” and “could have been” doing. What matters most is that we bring our best self and best work to the table. Everything else is a distraction.

We must take care of ourselves first. It’s not selfish. It’s self care. And there’s a huge difference.

Over the past few years we have seen a significant rise in mental health issues. Anxiety, depression, stress, substance abuse and suicides have skyrocketed from feelings of fear, isolation, loneliness, despair and confusion.

It’s easy to see why. Just watch the news. Beyond that, there’s social media algorithms that result in doomscrolling and endless campaigns and advertisements that make us feel like we’re “not enough” (unless we buy the product, of course). There’s a huge profit to be made from fear and low self-esteem. And the more we consume, the more we destroy ourselves from within.

Now add in poor eating habits, sedentary lifestyles, lack of sunshine and isolation from other humans. We’ve become “too comfortable” as a society. Instead of cooking a healthy meal, we get fast food delivered. Instead of hitting the gym or reading a book, we Netflix and chill. This results in a vicious cycle, and can lead to many mental and physical health problems.

It’s time for a change. We need to take our power back.

Health needs to be a priority. We need to take responsibility and face our problems with honesty, compassion and the determination to better ourselves. This applies to mental, physical and emotional well-being. The more we work on ourselves and feel positive changes, the more we can inspire others to do the same. It’s time for a revolution of positive minds and healthy bodies.

Here’s some tips that seem to help me:

• Drink water. Stay hydrated.
• Eat a well-balanced diet. Yes, that includes vegetables!
• Exercise every day. Even a small walk will help boost your mood.
• Limit intake of soda and alcohol, and if you have a hard time cutting alcohol out of your life, please seek help.
• Get a good night’s sleep. I try to aim for around 6–8 hours a night.
• Have a journal to document your thoughts, dreams, goals and fears. Be real, honest and open. Get it all out in this book. It’s cathartic, and can really help put everything in perspective.
• Unplug from your devices and put your focus on a hobby, such as art, reading or gardening. Doing this can have a calming effect. It also can make you feel alive, and really appreciate the present moment.
• Prioritize real-life human interactions. Studies show that people need, and thrive with, friendship and human connection. We need to feel like we’re part of a community, that we belong. Digital interactions just aren’t enough.
• Go to therapy. Real, honest therapy where you can be open to discussing your shortcomings, fears and flaws and strategies to be the best you can be. Sometimes we just need someone to listen, and get advice from a non-biased perspective. Sure, the thought of enrolling in therapy can be scary, but trust me when I say that it is worth it.

In a world that seems to be evolving and making advances daily, we need to keep up. Learning new skills will help us adapt with any changes life can throw our way. There is no shortage of things to learn, and there is no limit to what we are capable of learning and becoming.

We live in a time where information is easily accessible. There are in-person classes, online courses through accredited universities, tutorials on YouTube, podcasts and books. Want to learn a new language? There’s an app for that. Want to learn to cook? There’s a YouTube channel for that. Want to learn to paint? There’s a local art class for that. Want to start your own blog? There’s an eBook for that. Want to be a better public speaker? There’s a masterclass for that. There is literally no excuse to not learn something new except for “lack of time.”

Learning new skills is something we need to do to keep our mind sharp and spirit curious. Think of it as exercise for the brain. It can improve concentration, cognitive skills and confidence. It will humble you, as you will be a beginner again. It will open your mind, and possibly introduce you to new friends. It will help add passion and purpose into your life. And, it will probably look great on your resume!

Some of the skills I learned over the last few years were kickboxing, backcountry skiing, making juices and smoothies, web design and emergency first aid and response. These skills gave me a sense of accomplishment, new hobbies and helped me in finding new paths in my career.

Learning new skills opens new doors to possibilities that you never even thought possible. Keep an open mind, and stay open to change.

Watching the mainstream news and scrolling through social media can lead us to thinking that the world is an extremely dangerous place full of division, violence and deadly diseases. Topics that often come up are political tensions, new variants and how close we are to war. Sure, there’s cute puppies and good deeds sprinkled throughout, but I’m sure those aren’t the content pieces you remember.

The media would have us believe that society is more divided than ever by political affiliation, vaccination status, race, class, gender identity and sexual orientation, to name a few. The reality is, most people aren’t this way. Most people fall in the “grey zone,” and see things through a pretty moderate lens. Most people are actually very open-minded and accepting. Go outside and talk to strangers. You’ll probably find that you can find things to agree on, and maybe even learn from opinions different than yours.

So what gives?

Fear and division sell. Simple as that. Can you imagine how “boring” the news would be with rational thinking and common sense? There would be no urgency. And it’s easy to get lost in the rabbit holes on each side of the spectrum. It’s easy to let emotions run wild (especially without reading the full article, or seeing stories from other perspectives). It’s easy to demonize and dehumanize the “enemy.” The past few years has left a lot of us with feelings of hopelessness and confusion, and blaming it on a group of individuals can offer an easy explanation to why things are the way they are.

As cliche as it sounds, we’re all in this together, whether we like it or not. It’s time to put aside our differences, egos, and perceptions. It’s time to unite to make this world a better place, one with connectivity, inclusion, growth, prosperity and positivity. We have to lead with love. It’s the only way forward, and out of this insanity.

We live in a society dominated by consumerism, consumption and comparison. The next big trend is always a swipe away. In a digital world where relevancy is currency, it’s easy to see how people get lost in the system just to keep up. Looking at advertisements and scrolling through other people’s social media highlight reels can make us feel pretty damn inferior. Not having enough, not doing enough and even not being enough are what fuels the economy, simultaneously destroying the mind and spirit.

We’ve been conditioned to think that the grass is greener, so we should never settle. We’ve been given the luxuries of having everything on demand. Want some fast food? You can get that delivered. Want a date? You can swipe through your local singles. There’s no shortage of options, but is that really a good thing?

It can be easy to get trapped in the quest for happiness in a world that pushes inadequacy.

So how do we stop this?

We must try to shift our mindset from one of scarcity to one of abundance. In order to truly be happy, we have to have a mindset of gratitude.

Gratitude comes from acknowledging what we have and who we are, instead of ruminating over what we lack. It doesn’t come from giving in to the latest trends. It doesn’t come from searching for the next best thing. And it most definitely doesn’t come from comparing yourself to the illusion of others.

As cliche as it sounds, I try to start each day journaling a list of affirmations and things I am grateful for in my life. It puts things into perspective and makes me feel lucky and blessed to live the life I do.

Here’s a few examples from my list:

• I am grateful to be alive today.
• I am grateful for my health.
• I am grateful for my family and friends.
• I am grateful to have a career I love where I can be creative and have control over my work-life balance.
• I am grateful to have a roof over my head, food in my fridge and a car that I can take to do the activities I love.

Once I really think about it, I can ask myself: What else could I really want? It’s easy to get caught up in the bullshit, but when I put things in perspective I feel pretty damn lucky. I have my health, family, friends, a nice place to live, a career I love, opportunities, adventures and memories.

Remember: The things we take for granted are things some people can only dream of having. Which brings me to my next lesson…

It’s said that some of the regrets most people have are the things they never did. We all have had opportunities that we were too afraid to take, activities we opted out of, and dreams we put on hold because we thought we had more time.

Life is so short, and we don’t know how much time we actually have. That’s why it’s so important that we don’t take anything for granted. That includes our time, health, family, friends, career, housing and experiences.

I always think about living a life of no regrets. That there is no guarantee of tomorrow, so today should be well-lived. That there might never be a next time. It motivates me to avoid procrastination, to try new things and to not waste my energy on things that don’t serve me. It motivates me to always be kind, and to never take other people in my life for granted either. Their time, energy and feelings are just as valid as my own, if not more.

Is there something you want to do? Start now. There might not be another time.

Death! Dying! Destruction! Storms! Sickness! Fear! Be afraid!

If you regularly watch the mainstream news and scroll through social media, you would think that the world is always on the brink of the apocalypse. You would assume that everyone hates each other, every virus is going to kill you, World War 3 is just days away, society is on the verge of collapse and that a catastrophic natural disaster is about to wipe out half the earth.

Unfortunately, there will always be catastrophic things that happen in the world, or even close to home. Remember: we can only control how we respond. Wasting time and energy worrying and living in fear does nothing but set you back. It does nothing but keep you in a stagnant state of dread, anxiety and depression.

Don’t let fear control you. Stay informed, but try to stay positive and be present. There’s so many experiences happening right now. Don’t miss out. Life won’t wait.

Even though the world may seem like a dark place, there is love and beauty everywhere. You just have to find it, or create it for yourself.

There’s a quote I love by Martin Luther King, Jr., that says: “Returning hate for hate multiplies hate, adding deeper darkness to a night already devoid of stars. Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate, only love can do that.”

Fighting hate with hate doesn’t work. It only adds to the negative energy and darkness. Think about the last time you got into a heated debate or argument. When both of you were throwing hurtful words and negative energy towards each other, did it make the situation better or worse? I’ll say worse. Bot of you probably left the argument drained of energy, hurt and resentful. Now, if one of you used compassion, understanding, empathy and love, do you think the situation would de-escalate? I do. And I know from personal experiences that it does. Trust me, it’s really hard to do. It’s hard to control yourself in the face of a fight. But it’s not about winning the argument (spoiler: nobody does), it’s about respect, love and growth.

We all operate on energy, and the more positive energy we put out, the more positive energy we get in return.

Always remember: Love wins.